Wednesday 18 August 2010

Two In One Day

At my age, too!

I've had second thoughts. I think I still need something like this to speak at.

I currently have old photo's from my childhood and some of them have made me well up.  It's the one's featuring my parents from before I was born. I want to ask questions about them. Who was that couple with you? Where was that taken? WHEN was that taken.  Another photo just came up. Me, aged about 6 or 7 in a field with cows in it. I've NO idea where or when it was taken.  The only two people who know the answers have gone - and it fucking hurts.

Day to day stuff is fine-  I can cope a-ok with that. But now and again things like this crop up, and I hate it.

Chasing Clouds

Hiya!

It's been a while hasn't it?  How are you?  How's the family?  Work ok?  Good. Me?  I've been keeping busy, you know.

Whilst driving home from work the other day, I was driving along a stretch of road that runs between two villages.  I could see the edge of a cloud reflecting on the road, in front of me.  I calculated that the cloud was moving at about 30 miles per hour.  I slowed down, just so I could literally chase the cloud. It was - for me - beautiful. I love nature. It's magnificent.

We're going on our summer holidays this weekend.  Up to Blackpool with my children in a caravan for a week.  Staying at a site that we've stayed at many times before. Now that might seem dull and predictable, but it means that my children can have some freedom on the site.  Freedom to come and go pretty much as they please. If they want to go up to the arcade for a bit - they can - because they know the site so (hopefully) they won't get lost.

Luke just sang a song to me the lyrics of which were along the lines of "I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I can't wait to see my brothers and sisters on my holiday because I love them. I'm so happy, I'm so happy".  He is so happy and very very excited!  Bless him.

My laptop has been an arse for me this last week. I've re-installed Windows on it three times. I'm getting a bit (lot) pissed off with it now.

My blogs are so so so shit it's upsetting me.  I might mothball this effort until the new year.  My one a day blog has completely sapped my words.  Or - maybe I don't actually need this anymore.  My head is still weird and messed up, but not AS messed up as it was when I started this blog.  Maybe I'm "OK" now?  Relatively speaking, of course.

Hmmmm.. Ok, so this might be the end of the road for anything close to a regular update on this blog.

Thanks for viewing & sorry I've bored you shitless.  T'ra.

Sunday 1 August 2010

Repression

Hi

So my daughter is finally here for a visit, which is nice - I'm pleased.  I know it's an age thing, but I hardly ever see her because she just camps out in her room with her psp chatting on facebook.

My hair is fucked.  It's such a state.  My lovely wife clippered me tonight because it was so bad. I have a ridiculous hairline which produces a V at the front and goes all wonky at the back.  I am SO tempted to clip it right back, but I look like an AIDS victim when it's like that.

My children have no manners.  They're not nasty, they just don't naturally use please and thank you.  We've done loads for them the last few days and a little bit of gratitude wouldn't go a miss.  I don't want them to be grateful for every little thing I do because some things you just do as a parent, but just occasionally to acknowledge hard work would be nice.

I like being nude.  Or rather - I'm comfortable being nude.  Nude around the house.  Nude on holiday.  I'll never shy away from a nude dare.  I have no hang-ups with nudity.  Now, I'm no adonis, not even close to one, but for me, nudity isn't about having the perfect body and showing it off.  It's not about anyone else - it's about me.  I cannot explain (and I've thought about it a lot today) why I feel so comfortable about nudity.  As a child, I am not aware that my parents were care-free in anyway when it came to nudity.  My lovely wife, however - does not feel the same. I don't mean she's prudish about her body because she's not.  She just doesn't want to be nude as often as me! :-)  I love every part of my wife's body and my view is "it's a shame" that she doesn't feel the same way I do.  Hmmmm.  One to ponder for me.

I'm tired and cranky and short tempered today. All in all - an arse to live with. Sorry to those sharing a house with me.